My GrandMa

I want to write a little bit about my GrandMa, or Niang Agung. Niang is Balinese word for grand mother. And Agung is her name, also her caste *Balinese people are mostly Hindu, and has Caste system like Indian Hindu. Her caste, and used to be mine too, is Ksatrya, the royal family*.

This morning I got e-mail from my Papa and Mami, that Niang Agung was not well. She did not want to eat and drink anything! Also, she was like having a dementia. My parents could not go directly to Bangli (our home village in central Bali island), because it was office hour and my Papa was in the middle of his workshop. Luckily, my uncle (Papa's younger bro), who is also a doctor, went to see her and decided that Niang Agung should be hospitalized at once. She needs a really good rest and to be monitored for her nutrition intakes. My parents finally came to see her later today at the hospital, right after the workshop was finished.

During her illness, Niang Agung often talks to 'persons' that she said had visited her. In fact, there is no presence of that 'persons'. Niang Agung also said she was visited by my uncle *doctor*'s wife, and had a chat with her...which eventually did not happen.

I cried when I read that e-mail. In my imagination, Niang Agung seems to be very weak, because her energy has deteriorated. She used to be a very energetic person. Until the last day I was in Bali, she regularly went to Denpasar, one hour drive from where she lives, for senior citizens activities. She likes to travel. She had gone to Australia, to visit my uncle *my Papa's other younger bro* and his family. She had gone to Singapore, with other senior citizens, by land transportation then followed by ferry trip to S'pore island!!!

I feel so worried that I would not see her again. I cried and cried in the bathroom, felt so sorry that I could not be with her during her illness.

Our relationship was never really close. She did not like my parents' marriage, because my Mami was from lower caste *ridiculous, isn't it???* She was very harsh to my Mami, especially during the initial years of my parents' marriage. As her grand daughter, I often felt that she treated me differently. Over time, she began to realize her mistakes. Mostly because none of my three aunts (my Papa's sisters) married the same level caste. That's life! Life treats you the way you treat life! My Mami is always amazing. She never had acted and treated in a negative way to the Royal family.

I understand how Niang Agung acted previously. She is from the Royal family. She is the youngest daughter of the last King of Bangli. She had experienced the privilage of being a Princess. She went through the cultural and social life changes...must be a shock for her.

Anyhow, she is a special person to me. She is my grand ma. She is my son's great grand ma. Niang Agung was the first senior member of the Royal family who openly accept our marriage. She explained why my Papa was very mad and tell us how we should react. Abdes and I think she had a great effort to mend our relationship.
And she also treats Getar and Abdes very well, even has good relationship with my parents-in-law.

I can only send a prayer to God that she will get well soon and get her energy back. If only I can be beside her....