Irreversible Transformation

This thought came when I was folding the laundry, in front of the tumble dryer. *imagine a scene of Desperate Housewife, the nice one though, not the naughty one.*

One question.

"If I have all the money in the world, all the available time, but only for this weekend, where would I go? Alone."

Snorkling at Bunaken? Learn to dive at Raja Ampat? Feeding the Komodo? Horseback riding at Bromo? Eat all kind of foods in Medan? Reaching the equator line at Pontianak? Shopping in Jakarta? Watch movies and go clubbing in Singapore? See the exotic shows in Bangkok? Exploring the old city of Hong Kong? Extra fast trip to New York to have bagel with cream cheese at Manhattan? Come to a party at Ibiza? Or go down under for a winter getaway?

The truth is I don't know where I want to go if I have to go alone. Having this imagination leaves me feeling guilty.

That's the problem for me who have been married, happily for sure, for almost 13 years (plus the 3 years relationship before getting married), with two children.

It sounds like a privilege to be a fun, fearless, independent woman, who can go anywhere in the world and enjoy the luxury that the world offers to a woman.

Being married, being a mother, totally changes a woman's life. Not in a negative way. It is a transformation; an irreversible transformation. Like a caterpillar that turns to be a butterfly. No matter how fun it looks like to be a crawling creature, the butterfly just can't go back to be a caterpillar (a bad sample, isn't it? Well, it is better than making a comparison of tadpole --> frog, right?). The butterfly just have to fly and explore the world as a flying creature.

Well, I have finished folding the laundry. It's time to prepare dinner for hubby and the boys.